I know now there is no one thing that is true - it is all true


Time for another round. The kind with a winner and a loser. The trouble with loving is not being loved back, or the fear of being loved too much. Tragic, isn't it? Degrees of love are not good. Love should be love. And you should not be ashamed of being on either end of that.

Being honest will probably scare her off. But, at least it's worth a try. She seems able to understand. I hope she does, because, as soon as the courage comes I'm going to try.

Midnight, June 20

To hell with it! Funny how things work out some times. I'm telling myself I don't care now. It could be true, but egos are very sensitive.

Now it's time to back up and try again. (I obviously didn't mean that about, "To hell with it."

There is someone else now, so maybe I do mean it. Love, and subsequently life, are just too damn confusing sometimes. So I'm going to sleep!.

October 18

It's been a long, strange summer. I really don't think it's fair. I mean about how some people must "belong" to other people. I know I have enough love to spread around to several people at one time. Why can't others'

A very beautiful person walked through my life this summer. It was someone who will be very hard to forget. Words can never fully express the life and vitality she carries with her. Memories have a strange way of altering life. Up until a few months ago, she wasn't here. She isn't here now. But her memory is, and it makes all the difference in the world. I'm sure it's all for the best, but it'll take a while to convince my heart.